


What's Left in the End

by Writtenonmybody



Series: They had each other [3]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-22
Updated: 2020-09-22
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:21:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26603644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Writtenonmybody/pseuds/Writtenonmybody
Summary: The medical droids returned. They would not let Finn leave until he was checked over and had eaten something without throwing up. Finn was chomping at the bit desperate to know what happened. Poe felt an unreasonable rage at the droids who hadn’t been there when Finn woke up. His tender concern had vanished. He didn’t know what he expected to happen. Well, that’s not entirely true. Poe had had a few hundred daydreams about what might happen when Finn awoke from his coma. Absolutely zero of those were what was actually happening.
Relationships: Poe Dameron & Finn, Poe Dameron & Finn & Rose Tico, Poe Dameron/Finn
Series: They had each other [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1921273
Kudos: 9





	What's Left in the End

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to explore the Last Jedi in the angst of the unexpressed and the sweetness of the love of Finn and Poe, plus incorporate some of the deleted scenes. I did use dialogue from the movie. I'm sure Disney could care less but obviously they have all the rights. Basically I wanted to reframe the perspective of everything. Next time though I might write Poe into Canto Bight. We'll see.

I.

The medical droids returned. They would not let Finn leave until he was checked over and had eaten something without throwing up. Finn was chomping at the bit desperate to know what happened. Poe felt an unreasonable rage at the droids who hadn’t been there when Finn woke up. His tender concern had vanished. He didn’t know what he expected to happen. Well, that’s not entirely true. Poe had had a few hundred daydreams about what might happen when Finn awoke from his coma. Absolutely zero of those were what was actually happening.

Finn ate quickly and the medical droids released him moving on to injured pilots who were being brought in from the last mission. Poe had spent hours laboring over the repair of Finn's jacket. Poe had planned to present it to Finn, maybe even with his heart, but now Finn was all business and all Rey. Poe changed his mind on both accounts and held the jacket balled up at his side as they strode down the hallway.

“So you blew up Starkiller base?” Finn repeated.

“Yep.”

“Rey beat Kylo Ren and the Resistance got the map.” Finn eyed Poe with some confusion. Poe did not look happy. In fact Poe looked angry and walked faster. Wounded were being brought in and Resistance fighters surging through the hallways around them. 

Finn grabbed Poe’s arm. “You won, right?” Poe halted and they stared at each other. “Why doesn’t this feel like winning?” Finn asked. 

“We came out of hiding to attack Starkiller. It didn’t take long for the First Order to find our base. Now we’ve got to regroup.” Poe was dying a little. I’ve got to get away from this conversation, he thought. “And go back at ‘em,” Poe said forcefully. 

A fighter walked right between them but neither noticed. Whenever they were caught in each other’s eyes, the rest of the world stopped existing, even when it was the rest of the world they were talking about.

Finn faltered thinking, I’m not a hero like you. 

“Look, I believe in what you are doing here but I didn’t join this army.” 

I’m not good enough for you. 

“I don’t want you to think I’m something I not,” Finn mumbled faster. 

But maybe you could love me anyway? Kriff, I'm glad he can't hear my thoughts. 

Poe’s eyes softened. All ideas of staying aloof fled in the face of Finn's earnest consternation. “Hey, hey, it’s fine. You’re here with us,” Poe soothed, rubbing Finn’s arm where he held it. “Where you belong.” 

Finn’s heart cracked wide. He had never belonged anywhere, and he certainly had never had anyone else care about him like that. Poe partially changed his mind, again, and thrust the jacket into Finn’s hands. Finn held it surprised and confused. 

“It’s your jacket.” Poe said roughly, his voice cracking just slightly. Finn caressed the leather running his finger over the decidedly child-like stitching. He lifted his face staring at Poe with wonder, and the slightest trace of hope. It was so thoughtful, so personal. What did it mean? 

Finn wasn’t saying anything. Why wasn’t he saying anything, Poe panicked internally. 

“I-I’m not much of a sewer.” 

Finn still wasn’t saying anything. 

Poe ran from the terrifying vulnerability he felt and practically sprinted away saying moodily over his shoulder, “But, you know, I was busy, saving the entire fleet.” 

Finn, left behind in the hallway, caressed the jacket again with a wondering ache. Why could he never say anything when Poe was here? Once again, he’d stood mute. 

Most of the Resistance leadership was dead. Miraculously Leia had used the Force to pull herself through space to the remaining ship. As she was put on a stretcher the binary tracker that she held so Rey could find them fell from her wrist. 

Finn picked it up thinking, I can’t do anything here. I'm not a pilot. But I could get this beacon as far from here as possible so my friend won’t return to a trap. Poe would be fine. Poe had cheated death before. He could do it again. Poe would be fine. He would be fine. 

II.

Rose thought Finn was a hero of the Resistance when she first saw him, just like Rey had. But he was feeling more like former stormtrooper FN 2187, like Finn was some other self that he could see but was slipping away from. Everything was falling apart, as usual, and Finn only wanted to save his friend. Rose had said he was selfish, and maybe he was. Nevertheless he had gone into Starkiller base just to save his friend and it’d work out alright. As if in response to the thought his back twinged in pain. 

Now he and Rose had cooked up a plan to save the fleet, and Rey. Rose was all shining hero eyes at him again. Poe will help us, Finn thought. Because Poe is always here. Because Poe is a hero.

Poe’s frustration and impotence were boiling over when Finn and Rose came to him. They’d found him in the medbay with Leia pacing like a caged nexu. Admiral Holdo wouldn’t tell him her plan and it was making him crazy. He needed to do something, or at least know that they were going to do something. Poe was used to being in charge, Leia’s second. When Poe’s mother died and Leia’s son went to the Dark Side, they had become family. Now she was lying unconscious and Poe didn’t know what to do.

Finn spoke to Poe with such fervor following Poe’s abrupt switches, stepping closer every time Poe put distance between them. Then Rose interrupted again finishing Finn’s sentence, as if they were of one mind, as if they were intimate.

“How’d you two meet?” The jealousy in Poe’s heart made it come out angry and suspicious. 

Finn silently pleaded with Rose. Don’t tell him. Don’t tell him I was leaving. 

“Just luck,” Rose demurred.

“Yeah? Good luck?”

“Not sure,” Rose admitted.

Poe put his hand tenderly in Leia’s. What would Leia do?

“Poe,” Finn urged. “We’ve got to do this. It’ll save the fleet, and it’ll save Rey.” 

Poe wanted to weep. Rey again. Maybe I don’t need to be jealous of Rose. Maybe none of that matters because the First Order is about to murder us all. 

Finn holds out the beacon. He stretches out to Poe, his hand, his whole self reaching. Help me, Finn thinks. Trust me, like I trust you. 

Poe takes the beacon.

III.

What was left of the Resistance stood at the window watching as Admiral Holdo slammed the shop into light speed straight into Supreme Leader Snoke’s flagship. Poe had been so wrong. So wrong about her, so wrong about how best to save the Resistance. Now they were only a few left speeding to an ancient Rebel base, and Finn, beautiful Finn, and BB8, his best buddy, were on that ship that was slipping in half in space.

Poe pressed his hand against the window trying to hold himself up, head falling forward. His despair was so massive that he was numb. Leia called him over to her. His only comfort was that she had forgiven him. Those who had stood by him and those who had stood by the Admiral were one Resistance again.

The moment the Resistance landed they disembarked at a run unfurling old weapons, tech, speeders and began closing the massive door. Sure enough the First Order was right behind, ships flying and lasers blazing. One ship managed to crash under the door as it closed slicing off its’ wings. Poe and Leia stood in the open blasters firing while others shot from behind large metal equipment. 

“Don’t shoot! Don’t shoot! It’s us!”

“Hold your fire!” commanded Poe and everyone ceased. Then in an entirely improbably, surely miraculous, maybe the Force has not abandoned us kind of way, Finn’s head popped up. He gave Poe that dopey grin he had that made the rest of the world disappear.

“F-f-f-finn!” Poe crowed as he heard soared. Oh, and “Rose! You’re not dead!” Surprise and happiness and then demanding, “Where’s my droid?” BB8 rolled and raced over to Poe’s feet whirring and beeping out his whole story. Finn’s smile became even more lop-sided as he watched Commander Poe drop to the ground exclaiming like a delighted little boy. “Buddy! I’m so glad to see you!” He rubbed BB8’s sides and kissed the dome of his head. 

Force, Finn wished Poe would greet him that way. Maybe not the top of his head though…

“Finn!” Rose knocked him out of his reverie. “Is this all that’s left?” 

People were helping them climb down. There were so few. Rose was the only technician left. Now that the door was fully closed, they were taking stock of what they had, what was unusable, and what could be strapped together enough to make a stand. Everyone was overwhelmed but they pushed forward. That’s what they did.

When the cannon rolled up and Finn told them what it was, there was total silence. Even Poe was stymied, his hope faltering. Finn couldn’t have that. Finn had remembered Poe’s words to him when he’d woken up from the coma, and he echoed them to Rose when they flew back from their failed mission, when she’d been unsure what to do. “We’re going where we belong.” Finn had finally chosen. He had joined the Resistance. He had committed. He belonged here with the Resistance, with Poe, and he’d be damned if they were going to give up hope now. 

“Come on,” Finn called. We have allies.” 

Poe watched Finn with awe as Finn stepped into leadership. We, Finn had said, and that alone made his adrenaline start to flow again. 

“People believe in Leia.” Before this Finn had always called her General Organa. However, just like for Poe and Rey and the others, Leia had become the incarnated essence of a different tomorrow, a better tomorrow. “They’ll get our message. They’ll come. But we have to buy time. We have to take out that canyon.”

As if his words were a rush of oxygen everyone suddenly breathed in and sprang to action. The entire cave was lifted by Finn’s faith. In moments they organized a ground crew and a speeder crew. Finn and Rose became riders out of need. With adrenaline surging they sped out into death and glory. Their speeders were falling apart but their spirits were full. Finn’s natural enthusiasm filled the airwaves, “WHOO-HOO! YEAH!” Poe and Finn’s ever-present banter spurred them on. If they could laugh, maybe they could survive. 

Rey and Chewie swooped in on the Millennium Falcon drawing off all the TIE Fighters. Pow crowed as he inwardly told himself never to be angry with Rey again. “She drew them off! All of them!” 

“Oh, they hate that ship!” chuckled Finn ebulliently.

Unfortunately despite the Falcon, despite their scrappy spirit, the battle was turning as battles do. They were taking heavy losses, being picked off one by one. For Poe this was the moment when everything went quiet. Finally, Poe was able to see beyond the need of the moment to the need of the movement as a whole.

“Retreat!” he ordered. Immediately every fighter turned back. Every fighter except Finn. Finn, incorrigible Finn, choosing now of all times to stop running. Poe’s voice rose in an angry panic. “Retreat Finn, that’s an order!” 

“No, I won’t let them win!” This was how Finn was going to save his friends, save Rey and Chewie and Rose and Leia and Poe. He was going to fight the First Order to the end, and this was the end. He took off his headset so he couldn’t hear Poe or Rose. He closed his eyes whispering, I love you.

Finn was going to kill himself flying straight down the middle of the battering ram. Poe was too far away to reach him in this rust bucket speeder, and Finn wasn’t listening to him. I haven’t told him, Poe raved to himself. I haven’t told him anything.

Suddenly Rose’s speeder rammed into Finn jolting him off course and crashing them both into the ground. Finn dragged her unconscious body trying to get back behind the door, though he didn’t know what good that would do with the cannon still there. He couldn’t think about that though. He couldn’t think about what she’s said and did before she passed out either. He was confused and overwhelmed.

Poe was unsure whether Finn was dead or alive, again. Was their whole relationship going to be like this? They didn’t have a relationship anyway, Poe railed internally, or a life for themselves or the Resistance. 

Leia declared that the galaxy had lost hope. Her sitting down as she said these word was all of their defeat. 

But then.

Then, Luke-kriffing-Skywalker strolled in like the kriffing legend he was, and everything changed. Everything changed again.

Finn arrived with Rose, both alive. The healer who was left grabbed her checking her vitals and tending to her. Finn ran to Poe and they threw their arms around each other. Finn opened his mouth but no words came out. They all turned as Luke-kriffing -Skywalker sauntered out, alone, to face the entire army of the First Order.

What was left of the Resistance watched in horror as every gun fired on Luke. They watched in amazement as they smoke cleared and the Jedi stood there, still alive. Poe jolted them all back to regular reality when he said, “He’s doing this for a reason.” 

Force, he’s brilliant, Finn thought gazing at Poe willing his own mouth to open. 

“He’s stalling so we can escape,” Poe said.

“Escape?” Finn gasped. “He’s one man against an army! We have to help him! We have to fight!”

“No," Poe was resolute. “We are the spark that will light the fire that will burn the First Order down.” He turned to Finn as if Finn were the only one in the cave. “Skywalker’s doing this so we can survive. 

Unbidden Rose’s words echoed in Finn’s mind. 'This is how we win, not fighting what we hate, saving what we love.' 

“Listen!” Poe ordered facing the back of the cave.

Picking up on Poe’s thoughts Finn asked, “Where’d the crystal critters go?”

“Follow me!” Poe commanded. There was something in his tone. This wasn’t just this instant. This was the future, the future under his command. Finn stepped forward immediately. The rest of the Resistance fighters turned to Leia. 

“What are you looking at me for? Follow him.” Poe’s mouth cricked the smallest smile. She had forgiven him, and she’s just bequeathed him the Resistance. As he strode forward, as they all followed, Leia smiled that same small smile.

Finn raced behind Poe. Even now growing warm at the sign of Poe’s tight end and his new leather jacket just over the edge of his pants. Poe arrived first and was yelling. They’d reached a cave-in. Poe climbed up the rocks and was scraping the tiny hole the creatures had slipped out of with his bare hands. There was no way they could move them. Finn grabbed Poe’s hands to stop him as they were already bleeding.

"Poe!" Finn yelled grasping Poe's shoulders. He was going to say something this time. 

Poe’s eyes were burning with rage and questions, but then they heard the sound of stones shifting. 

Finn was still staring at Poe but Poe was turning to the sound. Finn’s hand was slowly caressing down Poe’s arm, but cold air smacked Finn’s attention to where Poe was gazing transfixed. 

Rey stood motionless moving hundreds of rocks with her mind. She had become a Jedi, but she would not be the last.


End file.
